My final triathlon of the summer is coming up next week in Washington DC. I barely reached my fundraising goal of $1900...but through a little nudging of my friends, I got over the final "hump."
As usual, I had a fundraising contest...and whoever donated the most to my Leukemia and Lymphoma Society account got to challenge me to one wild and crazy dare. To get the final few hundred dollars, I let a few of my friends pool their money together to motivate them to donate. We'll call them the Phallus-less Foursome.
Donate they did...combining to donate $251...a full $1.00 more than my highest donator (sorry, Led). The cocky little bastards then started to taunt me with how horrible their dare was going to be. No hints. Just smirks and laughs at my upcoming fate. That just wouldn't do!
So, in a moment of brilliance, Tauni decided to donate another $175 to put her total donation amount to $275. A complete facial...Tauni loves those.
In the end, though, Tauni decided to accept the Phallus-Less Foursome's dare...so, within one week after the triathlon I have to get an enema/colonic.
Thank you Phallus-less Foursome! I'll be sure to send you guys the pictures.
Since this triathlon is rather far away, we had to ship our bikes last Saturday so that they would be in DC by race time. This meant we had to use these things called "tools" to do something called "disassemble" our bikes. As soon as I realized this was going to happen, I got a little nervous.
For whatever reason, I'm not super good with my hands, as it were...especially things that are all metal. Why? I don't know! Cars, bikes, weapons of mass destruction...you name it...if it's all metal, I'm all thumbs!
So I showed up early to our bike disassembling party so I wouldn't be the last one done. Considering half the people taking their bikes apart were going to be women...I felt an additional sense of pressure not to be horrendously slow.
Even though I had a head start, everyone else finished unscrewing and dismantling and packing their bikes up MUCH faster than I did. I had to keep looking at what other people were doing and double and triple checking that I wasn't doing mine wrong. I just have no confidence with this type of thing and had this illogical fear that my bike was somehow going to explode if I turned the wrong screw or removed the wrong thingamabobber.
LLS folk are not like my other friends, though. Not one comment was made about me being a girl or gay or lame or stupid because I was very slow at getting my bike apart and into the shipping box. It's weird being surrounded by supportive people and not constantly ridiculed over every slight discrepancy that might show that I'm not perfect or not "a man."
What a great feeling! I can't wait to repay these pussies by blowing their slow-asses out of the water during the race. What a bunch of pansies!