Sunday, February 10, 2008

The Trilogy Part 1: My Round Savior

I have had a series of odd events happen to me recently...so many so, I thought I would create a three-part series about them. Joy.

While at school last Sunday, a policeman walked up to my office’s window that has a picturesque view of other bungalows. This was slightly embarrassing because when he finally got my attention, I think I had one of my fingers almost completely down my throat. I bite my fingernails when I am concentrating and/or am stressed.

He was about six feet tall and wide and was watching me intently...I'm not sure if it was the glare off the window, but he peered into me. It felt really dirty. I swear he licked his lips.

Policeman: Hey...How much longer are you going to be here?

Now, I'm in my office, with a key and an alarm code proving my worthiness of wasting my Sunday at work, and I thought he was implying: LEAVE! So, I was very confused about his question and his intense staring...bordering on leering.

Me: Um...I don't know, two to three hours. Why? Do I need to leave?

Policeman: Hey man, it's your Sunday!

And he laughed and laughed at his own joke. His stomach bounced rhythmically with each chuckle. I just choked on my half-chewed fingernail, wondering where this was going. Dude...just don't ask me out for coffee.

Me: So...

Policeman: You dont need to leave. Just if something goes wrong, and I know you are one of the few people here...I know right where to come if there is trouble.

Well isn't that comforting. Do people usually get attacked on the weekends at my school? And I'm not sure Chef Boyardee was going to be much help. He had a badge, but it looked like he had eaten his partner. Maybe he was simply plotting good angles to peep at me.

Me: Thanks!

He walked away...and my fingernail biting got worse. I spent the next few hours constantly checking out the window for my round savior.

4 comments:

Tauni said...
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Tauni said...
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Tauni said...

He even waved goodbye to you while you were walking to the car. I bet he checked out your ass as you walked away....

Lali said...

I think Chef Boyardee is sexy.