Thursday, January 26, 2006

Do It Yourself

I am in the middle of a home improvement project, of a sort. I am building shelves from my bedroom. And while I was under the impression that such a thing was supposed to be a cost saving mechanism...here I am about $300 to $400 into the hole for a couple pieces of wood on the wall. As America itself has shown us, liberty does indeed have its price....and it is worth every penny.

This isn't the first thing I have built from scratch. I removed and replaced my deck in Hayward about a year ago, which involved such interesting adventures as (1) Finding 20-year-old toys under the old deck, (2) hiring a day laborer off the streets of Hayward to assist in the hammering, and (3) realizing that I like building shit.

There truly is some innate satisfaction with doing something yourself...and seeing a product sitting before you that you created. YOU...the person who might not even be able to change a lightbulb.

So, my shelves are presently in the garage...drying after the second stage of staining...and they are awaiting to be sealed.

And this project has made me think about other things I could do for myself, but presently don't or haven't. I'll let you figure out which ones are real (which wont be tough. I am speaking to myself since no one reads my blog.):

(1) Fix My Own Car
(2) Small, Elective Surgeries...and some larger non-elective ones
(3) Create a police state in my home and lower the terror-threat level to green so that I don't have to show up the airport three hours early for a one-hour flight that ends up being two-hours late (no...I'm not bitter)
(4) Whacking People (I have been watching a lot of Oz, recently)
(5) Buy and Sell My Own Homes
(6) Buy Stock (I did this one a few weeks ago!)
(7) Do laundry instead of taking things to the dry cleaner
(8) Use poison instead of blunt objects (see number 7)
(9) Fellatio
(10) And last but not least: Fellatio. (I really want to do that myself)

3 comments:

prez said...

I read your blog.

I took great pride from building my bookshelf a year ago even though I hadn't eaten in 48 hours and had a heart arrhythmia every time I picked up the hammer. So I know what you mean.

Especially about the fellatio thing.

Middento said...

I, too, read your blog. You should update more often. My bored students may lrk over to your blog as well, who knows.

I also learned that I can do home improvement when I had to redo my laundry room -- which also involved putting up shelves. Unlike you, however, while I realized I could do it, I also realized I hate it.

And, for you information (along with prez), self-sucking is soooo 1987.

Chris said...

I saw his shelves. They looked like shit.